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- WELCOME

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- INNER RESEARCH

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- WHAT'S ON YOUR DESK?
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- MOMENT IN THE HISTORY OF WRITING 
- WEBSITE TIP

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- MAKING A SCENE

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- JUST CURIOUS 
- LITTLE-KNOWN FACTS ABOUT ...
- CURRENT CONTEST

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- CLEANING UP YOUR PROSE
- SAMPLE OF EXCELLENCE

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- CHALKBOARD

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- QUIZ CORNER
- FUN SITE OF THE MONTH

 


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CLEANING UP YOUR PROSE

Adjectives are meant to enhance, to provide a clearer mental picture of a nondescript noun. But when a noun describes itself, an adjective can easily become a needless superfluous redundant overkill beating of a dead horse. And we sure don't want that. 

Study your adjectives carefully. Make sure they're adding something to the picture, not repeating it.


EXAMPLE:
Beyond the hanging beads, we walked into a room of candlelight. She pointed us toward the table with the round orb in the center.
CLEANED UP:
Beyond the hanging beads, we walked into a room of candlelight. She pointed us toward the table with the glass orb in the center.

EXAMPLE:
Elgier directed his thoughts to the pint-sized dwarf.
CLEANED UP:
Elgier directed his thoughts to the surly dwarf.

EXAMPLE:
Furthermore, they ordered that at no time would a foreign alien control the government.
CLEANED UP:
Furthermore, they ordered that at no time would a foreigner control the government.

 

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SAMPLE OF EXCELLENCE

    It was the very witching time of night that Ichabod, heavy-hearted and crest-fallen, pursued his travel homewards, along the sides of the lofty hills which rise above Tarry Town, and which he had traversed so cheerily in the afternoon. The hour was dismal as himself. Far below him, the Tappan Zee spread its dusky and indistinct waste of waters, with here and there the tall mast of a sloop, riding quietly at anchor under the land. 

In the dead hush of midnight, he could even hear the barking of the watch dog from the opposite shore of the Hudson; but it was so vague and faint as only to give an idea of his distance from this faithful companion of man. Now and then, too, the long-drawn crowing of a cock, accidentally awakened, would sound far, far off from some farmhouse away among the hills—but it was like a dreaming sound in his ear.

                                                     - WASHINGTON IRVING
                                      The Legend of Sleepy Hollow

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